The S P F Blog

We are seeing plenty of activity on the compliance front, both with authorities getting keen on compliance visits and with the ‘no win no fee’ vultures scrambling to clarify their position for the regulation changes in April.

There is a bit of a feeling that the end of no win no fee will mean the end of trivial or spurious claims and that we can all breathe a little easier. I would disagree with this, I think no win no fee will remain, just by another name.

What we are going to get instead are ‘Damage Based Agreements’, which means the claimant agrees to pass over a percentage of the amount recovered to the acting solicitor.

That sounds like a more sensible arrangement, on the face of it, doesn’t it? Well, yes it sounds like a more sensible arrangement but as this is based on the US model, and the US is hardly litigation free these days is it? , we should hardly hold our breath waiting for the end of compensation claims.

Now available through the miracle of Ebay

Attractively priced at £9.95we expect to shift a gazillion of them

We like our databases over here, and are often asked to help with line checks in between stocktakes.

The solution we have come up with is a simple line check utility, there is no cost at any stage you just download, install and use it. The link below is to the forum to get at the download. If you would rather have an e-mailed version just drop me a line at the usual e-mail address.

http://www.s-p-f.net/phpbb/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=36

Having spent several hours changing VAT rates for the third time in what feels like ten minutes I can conclusively say that hard coding VAT rates in any sort of application is very, very poor design.

It seems like VAT has been at 17.5% forever, certainly for as long as I’ve been crunching numbers, but we have seen three changes in recent times and it’s proven to be a big fat pain in the butt.

I will never hard code a VAT rate again.

Where is the evidence that supermarkets sell alcohol at below cost? Why would they do that? It strikes me as yet another red herring; ‘the smoking ban is killing pubs’, ‘supermarkets are killing pubs’.
The reality is that people’s relationship with alcohol has changed over the years and off-sales are just part of that change.
On a very big subject, consider two points:

1 Whilst Tesco reported a billion pounds profit last year, a number which grabbed the headlines, their margin was 3% of turnover. They are operating in the way supermarkets always have; get the products people want, pile ‘em high and sell it cheap.

2 This time last year, Wetherspoons cut the price of Greene King IPA to 99p. This made their retail price less than many publican’s cost price. Did that make Wetherspoons guilty of below cost selling? And was there a backlash against them? No and no, they served the consumer what the consumer wanted and most people were happy about it.

If anyone wants a villain in this piece they should be looking at the disparity between what pubs and supermarkets are able to retail their products at. Don’t blame the supermarkets for that, have a look at the debt-burdened pubcos and the morally corrupt business model that many licensees are labouring under.

Those pubcos came about as a direct result of the last piece of government intervention in our industry; the Beer Orders. There seems to be a clamour for the government to get their hands on the licensed trade again and i know I’ve said it before, but in my opinion people should be careful what they wish for.

Stories in the press are suggesting that Punch may be about to call time on 6000 pubs. I would be a little surprised to see Punch fail, Enterprise look more vulnerable, but they do have debt of some £3bn and that takes some carrying.

I tried to work it out, the debt burden, on a per-site basis, but my calculator won’t do billions and neither will my head. The good news is that Google does do billions though, and as far as I can make out the numbers mean that Punch owe something in the order of £375,000 for each of their 8000 sites.

What that means in the raw is that, assuming an interest rate of 5%, all Punch sites need to produce around £20k per annum to service the debt; not a problem for many of the ex Spirit sites and city centre leased estate but a pipe dream for the closed/closing/limping-along-doing-almost-nothing sector of the Punch estate. In the real world, that means that the ‘distressed’ end of the Punch estate is over-burdened with debt and dragging the good stuff down; maybe they have found an answer?

The story in the press is not, when it’s dissected, a story about Punch selling 6000 pubs on the open market. The story is that Punch may be unloading 6000 pubs onto their bond holders and emerging from the mess debt free, and with their managed estate  intact. That sounds like smart business.

…has it really been that long since I updated the blog? My apologies.

We, licensed trade stocktakers, have an industry body; The Institute Of Licensed Trade Stock Auditors. I have so many issues with this organisation I don’t know where to start, but in the interests of venting I will give it a go

1 – I have a major problem with the word ‘auditor’. Auditors, to my mind, are accountants with an extra qualification. It’s wrong of us to give ourselves grand titles without earning the right to.

2 – The ILTSA, according to themselves, is ( are? ) ‘the only qualifying body for stock takers within the Licensed Trade’. Now, this is true but is their qualification worth having?

For instance:

Venners, the biggest stocktaking company in the UK do not have any ILTSA recognition on their website; they are not ILTSA members. Does this mean all the stocktakers working for Venners are not fit for purpose? Hmm, how about Capcon? A national company operating to ISO 9001 Gold Award standards and part of Capcon Holdings PLC? All their stocktakers are not qualified either according to ILTSA.

Me After a 25 year plus industry career, the last 15 as a stocktaker, ILTSA will tell you I’m not qualified to do the job. In fact, their ‘qualified’ stocktakers may well telephone my clients ( again ) and point out my shortcomings.

Their ‘qualification’ is a three hour exam consisting of some 20 questions, 18 of which are compulsory. There is no compulsion to carry out any training prior to taking the exam though, you can download the form, book the exam ( sorry, pay your fee when you book the exam ) and assuming you pass you are qualified.

The training course deserves special comment. The ILTSA will take around £600 off somebody, put them through a 3 day training course, charge them another few quid ( can’t be bothered looking ) for an examination fee and, assuming they pass, give them some letters after their name to prove that they are a qualified ‘stock auditor’. This, to me, seems a pretty dangerous way to introduce someone to the inner sanctum of your business but, of course, the guys that have the qualifications know best right?

I realise that my rantings could be interpreted as just another dis-gruntled moaner having a pop and that ILTSA are nothing but a bunch of splendid chaps trying to educate the ignorant and control an industry ripe for exploitation of the vulnerable and susceptible, so why not have a look at their website?

ILTSA Exam Booking Form

To reserve tour place on an ILTSA Exam, please use the link below to download and booking form and once completed, please post this back to ILTSA sending a cheque payable to “The ILTSA” with it. All rates exclude VAT @ 17.5% and a receipt will be sent once payment has cleared.

This is the best laugh I’ve had in a while. I think they may have subbed their copy writing out to an Eastern European call centre…

I’m on the phone talking to Sky about their ‘up to 20mb’ broadband speed. My stance is that their advertising is so scandalously exaggerated that it borders on deception and that they might as well offer ‘up too 100mb’

This is the speed test on my line, I’m 1000 metres from the exchange, 20mb broadband is absolute pie in the sky for most of us.